5 Years Anniversary of ALICE & FRIENDS CIRCLE™

Romanian literary evening featuring 5^th year anniversary of Alice & Friends Circle™

as well as Resilience & Compatibility

With absolute delight, I’m sharing that on Thursday (May 4, 2023) we celebrated the fifth anniversary of ALICE & Friends Circle™, together with a group of dear friends, who made special efforts to be able to join us despite their busy schedules.

This gathering was very special in many ways, but above and beyond I’m super happy to tell you that this was the first return at our usual place after few years of social austerity….needless to say that meeting in person with the friends of our Circle, in a place that triggers for each of us so many beautiful memories, it was really heart touching!

On that Thursday, I opened the evening by expressing my most sincere appreciation for the support our Circle received over the last five years (yes, 5 years!!!), for the devotion each of my friends were showing, for their loyalty and for all the beautiful concepts they each shared at our meetings over time.

Next, every guest got the chance to express their opinion/s about the existence and the activities of ALICE & Friends Circle™….it was really special to hear all their heart-warming remarks! Also, our dear friend Dorina wrote an article about this event, and our dear friends from “Observatorul” Magazine, from Toronto, published it (to read it, please follow this link…thank you!)

Additionally, our discussions referred to the significance of resilience & compatibility, concepts of relevance for our group.

As I always do, for your convenience, below I’m sharing with you only few highlights of these talks as well as few supplementary points, while maintaining the confidentiality of the personal aspects discussed:

● Few thoughts about the significance of RESILIENCE:

          (definition: resilience is the capability to recover quickly from difficult situation/s)

- According to many scientific studies, resilience it is not a matter of chance, but rather a matter of informed choices and determination, and the last few years being filled with the turmoil of the pandemic related restrictions did show us the significance of resilience while the entire world was in the midst of such hard times

- No matter how difficult life could get, if you have resilience you would find a way to keep going

- It is important to understand that resilience doesn’t mean that you need to stay in the middle of the storm, but if it happens to find yourself in it then resilience will help you to overcome it

- Resilience is a life skill, and we each need to work on building it every day; the more we work on it, the better we will get at handling difficult situations

- Cultivating resilience will help each of us to live a happier, healthier and longer life

● Few thoughts about the significance of COMPATIBILITY (in a group setting):

          (definition: compatibility is the state in which two entities are able to coexist without problems or conflicts)

- People with common values are compatible, and in building lasting relationships within a group this is a needed attribute

- In a society that is getting increasingly lonely, people have the tendency to cultivate mostly compatible friends

- If you have too many acquaintances, you might have less time for each, but if you choose to surround yourself only with compatible friends then you would have more quality time to spend with people who truly matter

- Socio-emotional selectivity theory finds that as we get older, we have limited time left on this Earth, and we turn towards relationships that feel meaningful, based on compatibility, while we might let go of the rest.

                                                                                  …and the group talks continued for a while…..

Further, we all were heading for light refreshments, which allowed for extensive, pleasant conversations around the table, recalling that food always tastes much better when you share it with like-minded friends. 

Then, before serving the festive cake I brought for the occasion, we had a toast, cheering for continuous prosperity in our midst, good health, longevity and joy, all accompanied by the notes of the famous Romanian song, called “La mulţi ani!” , which we all truly love.

Also, an old Romanian tradition was not forgotten, and at this gathering we brought red eggs (since the Easter recently happened) and we had the chance to practice the old custom of “egg tapping” (aka: egg knocking, egg fights, etc.) ….it was really enjoyable!

As you can easily imagine, time was flying by truly fast, but the new memories we’ve got the chance to produce will stay with us forever.

Concluding, before I wrap my briefing, I would like to express again my most sincere gratitude for all the love, appreciation, loyalty and support I received from my friends over the last five years….indeed, there is so much to be thankful for!

Until our paths will meet again on the same wavelength, my warmest regards to all my dear friends for a splendid rest of the spring!

Sincerely,

Alice

“TIME may be measured in MINUTES, but LIFE is measured in MOMENTS.” 

Mesaj personal din partea lui Alice, adresat la ceas aniversar

Dragii mei,

Iată că a sosit vremea pentru a sărbători şi cea de-a cincea aniversare a Cercului nostru literar şi socio-cultural, fapt ce ne-a adus la toți multă bucurie lăuntrică, cât şi satisfacția unui fundament sănătos şi stabil, pe care putem grefa frumosul, în toată splendoarea lui.

Timpul trece în mare grabă, iar viața are felul ei aparte în care ne testează, continuu, pe toți, reliefând cu multă claritate că prietenia este un dar de preț al omului.

Doresc să vă spun că de-a lungul acestui drum special, cu fiecare relație de prietenie în parte, întâi de toate, m-am străduit să fiu eu o prietenă cât mai bună, iar timpul mi-a arătat dacă am reușit...avându-vă pe toți lângă mine, am înțeles că sunt pe drumul cel bun şi la rându-mi vreau să vă mulțumesc, la fiecare în parte, pentru prietenia voastră față de mine!  

Am apreciat mereu politețea şi autenticitatea relațiilor de prietenie şi consider că acestea joacă un rol important ce contribuie la îmbogățirea noastră sufletească, având totodată potențialul de a ne înobila viața.   

Prieteniile frumoase şi echilibrate ne unesc...să le cerem şi să le oferim cu multă onestitate, omenie şi generozitate, în același timp amintindu-ne că mâinile întinse peste problemele vieții creează acea rețea fantastică ce ne face să ne simțim vii.

“Fiecare aparține timpului pe care știe să-l trăiască.”

Cu aleasă prețuire,

Alice  

“Let the beauty of what you love be what you do.” AliceFriendsCircle.blogspot.com

This event has been delivered in Romanian Language, featuring Romanian culture.

● Previous anniversaries of Alice & Friends Circle™ – 2022, 2021, 2020, 2019

NOTE: Dear readers, please be advised that on this website each of the previous postings, pertaining to the recurrent annual themes, portray a different perspective of the subject/s presented (same theme/s, but a different outlook without duplication due to the cultural richness of the specific topic/s discussed). 

The peculiarity of RESILIENCE

We all know that people who remain calm while facing difficulties in life have outstanding resilience, which is based on strong coping skills and the capability to find creative ways in order to manage the situation/s they are encountering. 

It has been noticed that resilience is not necessarily a matter of chance, but rather a matter of informed choice and determination, where the mental, the emotional and the physical bodies “collaborate” well in order to properly handle adversity and triumph in the midst of hard times.

        When we talk to people who have shown exceptional resilience, it is clear that they often have cultivated & maintained authentic connections that come from many parts of their life — not only through work, but through athletic pursuits, volunteer activities, civic or religious communities, book or dinner clubs, communities of parents they’ve met through their children, and so on. Interactions with these spheres provide a critical “dimensionality”, while broadening their identity & “opening the aperture” on how they look at their lives; people become more (or less) resilient through interactions with others.

        While at this point, a good question to ask yourself could be: are my existing relationships broad and deep enough in order to be able to support me if I might face difficulties in life?....definitively, a question worth pondering upon...

        According to scholars, there are few types of resilience, such as: psychological resilience (which is the ability to overcome adversity and persevere in spite of circumstances), social resilience (which is the capacity for communities to maintain their connections after an event or disaster, for example), or resilience in natural systems (such as trees that are able to survive under harsh weather conditions).

        Extensive research papers give the following reasons whey resilience is more important than ever, and here are few key points to consider:   

“The first is that humans are evolving, which means that, as a species, we are becoming more and more resilient.

The second is that things, like work, relationships, and families, are becoming more and more challenging.

The third is that our brains aren’t equipped to handle the changing times; for instance, our ability to learn has declined.

The fourth factor that is changing and weakening our mental reserves is the rate at which we are growing.

The fifth factor that is contributing to the weakness of our brains is stress which is a physical process.”

        As we each progress with our lives, it is crucial to understand that resilience is vital in being able to bounce back when we face difficulties, otherwise our health could be affected. Resilience does not mean that you have to stay in the middle of a hurricane; it’s something you can cultivate in your life to help you live happier, healthier and longer. Nowadays, resilience has become somewhat of a buzzword, and the trait in itself allows you to push through struggles and difficulties and to continue to have a good life.

        In order to further develop our resilience it is important to take steps to reduce the stress and anxiety (and out there it is a lot of reading about this).

        Closing here my brief dissertation, I truly believe that people need to work on building resilience every day, and the more you work on it, the better you become at handling difficult situations. Focusing on the present rather than dwelling on the past, worrying less about the future, being more thankful, being more active, exploring nature, sleeping and eating well, having good friends, and so on are only few simple things everyone can do every single day, with amazing results! It is true that it takes a lot of work, perseverance and discipline to go through the entire process, but in the end it is truly worth it….try it…

“When we learn how to become resilient, we learn how to embrace the broad spectrum of human experience.“

POEM: "Each life converges to some centre"

This beautiful poem, written by Emily Dickinson, suggests that every human being in life has a destination or a particular goal s/he is striving to achieve, while “acknowledging the individuality of each person’s journey and the well-known fact that everyone expresses themselves in their own unique way”. 

🌿🌿🌿🌿🌿
"Each life converges to some centre" 
 ~ short video clip (this poem in audio version) ~

 In life, the journey towards your goal is as valuable as the destination itself and the effort you put into it makes life amazing in every way!

COMPATIBLE or...not

Many observations clearly indicate that good friendships are heavily based on a sound compatibility, which is truly beautiful, but what is this “compatibility”?

According to definition, “compatibility refers to the ability of individuals to coexist harmoniously while respecting each other’s differences and the main signs of a good compatibility in relationships involve shared values, respectful communication, shared interests, trust, emotional connection, the willingness to compromise and a shared sense of humor, all being major factors in establishing a lasting bond between parties involved”….how simple, yet how challenging to achieve at times…

For a more careful look at this concept, here is a brief reading worth sharing further…enjoy it!

Short ARTICLE:

How to Know Which Friends to Keep

(Written by Marisa Franco, Ph.D. – former professor at Georgia State University and academic expert on friendship)

At some point, it pays to stop and discern who we really want in our life.

With the pandemic making friendships especially hard to maintain, many of us may be left wondering which of our friendships will endure, or more importantly, which of our friendships do we want to endure? Trimming friendships seems nonsensical in a society that's been getting increasingly lonely. Research finds, for example, that, our friendship networks have been shrinking over the last few decades, and we’ve been struggling to make friends. But trimming does have its benefits.

One of the benefits of trimming is that it can leave us with more time to spend with people who truly matter to us since the more friends we hold onto, the less time we may have with each of them. This is evidenced by one study that found that having more contacts was associated with spending less time talking to each one. Another study revealed, albeit obviously, that we need interaction to maintain friendship. If we’re spread too thin, we may neglect to put in face-time with friends that matter, leaving important friendships to wither. We risk ending up with a bunch of shallow friend-quittances.

Older people aren’t willing to take that risk. Socio-emotional selectivity theory finds that as we get older—we have limited time left on this earth—we turn towards relationships that feel meaningful and let go of the rest. This tends to go well for older people, as research finds that while they prune their friendships, they are more satisfied with the friendships they keep.

Older people’s friendships show us that when it comes to friendship, more isn’t always better. We can be discerning about the friends we add to our lives, by asking ourselves questions about our resources like:

- Do I have enough time for new friends amidst my other relationships and/or obligations?
- How overwhelmed am I by maintaining the friendships I already have?

Even if we do have enough time for friends, we may also trim friendships because we lack compatibility, or our friendships aren't necessarily healthy. We might ask ourselves questions to assess whether a friendship is working for us. These questions might include:
Do I feel like they are rooting for my success?  ●  Do I like who I am around them?  ●  Do I feel like myself around them?  ●  Do I typically feel energized or deflated by their company?  ●  Do they show an interest in me?

Time and compatibility are two major drivers that help us figure out which friends to keep in our lives. That means, at certain times in our life, when we have less time (e.g., when we just had kids), we may be more frugal with our friendships. That's okay. The important thing is that we are discerning rather than passive with who we keep in our life, assessing our friendships to figure out where our needs lie and navigating our friendships accordingly.

Sometimes it is not so much about how compatible you are, but rather about how you deal with given incompatibility…and that’s the real test…

April 22, 2023: INTERNATIONAL EARTH Day

Dear friends, today (April 22, 2023) is the International Earth Day, and the theme is “Invest in Our Planet” 

(same like last year – which in fact it is a continuation of the successful 2022 campaign).

In my opinion, this occasion is the perfect opportunity for each of us to be reminded to pay more attention to our environment and to make sure we each do our very best in taking the appropriate measures in order to preserve it! We often forget that WE ARE NATURE. Nature is not something separate from us, so when we say that we have lost our connection to nature actually we’ve lost our connection to ourselves … definitively something important to ponder upon.

Small action/s, big meaning…protect nature, preserve life!

● Background info:

Earth Day is an annual event celebrated around the world on April 22 to demonstrate support for ENVIRONMENTAL PROTECTION. First celebrated in 1970, it now includes events in more than 193 countries, focusing on engaging more than 1 billion people, governments, institutions and businesses to recognize our collective responsibility and to help accelerate the transition to an equitable, prosperous green economy for all.

● ARTICLES: Ways to go green for Earth Day 2023 and beyond | Earth Day 2023 – How soils changed life on Earth
● My previous greetings on the same theme: INTERNATIONAL EARTH Day – 2022, 2021, 2020, 2019